Funny jokes! He he he. Who needs to study? Not me.

Over in the Free Republic religion forum, a poster started this thread, asking, "can anyone tell me the differences between Christian denominations?" Talk about asking for trouble! In case you didn't know, the people on Free Republic can be sort of ... Touchy. There is bitterness even between different factions of Roman Catholics - schismatics, traditionalists, normative-liturgy people etc. It is actually a pretty good thread, although I have to warn you that there is Catholic-bashing, Evangelical-bashing, Mormon-bashing, and ECUSA-bashing (although personally I think that with regard to the ECUSA, they have done a pretty good job of winning that scorn).

I did come across these two jokes on the thread, though. I've heard the second one before, but the first one is equally priceless ...

How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb? Depends.

Charismatic: Only 1. Hands already in the air.

Pentecostal: 10. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterian: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.

Baptist: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

Episcopalian: 3. One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.

Unitarian: ?. We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent,3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodist: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church-wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.

Nazarene: 6. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

Lutheran: None. Lutherans don't believe in change.

Amish: What's a light bulb?

Ahhhhhh. Most amusing. Yay, candle-lovers! I would have to say that some Lutherans do like change, as evidenced by some recent developments in the ELCA. Here's another good one:

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man about to jump off. I immediately ran over and said:
"Stop! Don't do it!"
"Why shouldn't I?" he asked.
I said: "Well, there's so much to live for!"
"Like what?"
"Well... are you religious or atheist?"
"Religious."
"Me too! Are you Christian or Jewish?"
"Christian."
"Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant?"
"Protestant."
"Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?"
"Baptist."
"Wow! Me too! Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?"
"Baptist Church of God."
"Me too! Are you Original Baptist Church of God, or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?"
"Reformed Baptist Church of God."
"Me too! Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915?"
"Reformation of 1915!"
To which I said, "Die, heretic scum!" and pushed him off.

LOL. Sometimes it seems that way in our Big Happy Christian Family!